This was truly beautiful. The story, the ambience, the music, the art, the way how characters interact with each other... It's fair to say I'm in love with all these!
The only suggestion I can think of right now is that the text in the "Help", being white on a bright background, is a bit hard to read. An altered colour scheme could help.
Keep up with the great work, I can't wait to learn what's going to happen next.
I am sooo in love with this project! It looks great!!! I'm downloading the demo right now! Honestly I don't like playing demos because it just makes it harder to wait but I'll succumb to my desire lol. Also one more thing, you should probably take out the tag "otome" because it can mislead the wrong audience. Otome means a dating sim for girls that has a female mc with male love interests. Good luck with you're project, I am cheering you on!
Shiiit... Pardon my language, but I seriously can't wait for this to be reallll! I'm going to declare myself Ertal's number 1 fan, please don't fight me on this, you'll lose. I seriously can't get over how great all of these games are. The storylines are frickin amazing and the art is fantastic! Ugh, I'm obsessed.
And yes, I hope the sprite artist finishes Denis, Nathalie and Ophelia's sprites for the updated demo, before the Kickstarter. The new GUI will be done by then, too.
For the finished games ALL the characters will have a sprite.
First of all, I want to say that I was really impatient to be able to play this demo! And I'm not disappointed at all~
Of course, it's short, doesn't show much of the game and have small mistakes in it. It's a demo. But just that little hour I took to play it, made me even more impatient to discover the rest of the story, characters and choices you have in store for us.
But enough chit-chat! Let's review this~
First, for the things I liked:
( + ) Paul's and Gilles' facial expressions are really cute. Great job Marimo, you nailed them. The other characters' sprites are great too (except for two of Ferdinand's expression which are... a bit disturbing XD).
( + ) The story, although we didn't see much of it, was great and relaxing after such a heavy subject like slavery in "My Burning Heart". I dived into it immediately. As for the characters, they have their own distinct personality too. Paul is adorable and impossible to hate, Emile is a bit rude but seems to hide a lot of things, Ferdinand is silent and way too serious for his own good, and Gilles looks like an innocent little kid in this cruel world! So far, I'm impatient to discover more about them~
( + ) The music is really relaxing and a treat for the ears. I especially like the one you hear when you are at the riverbank! I could definitely join Paul and start painting while listening to this song. I also like the sax song and "Let's fall in love" was a nice surprise! Great addition~
( + ) Maybe it's because I'm French but I was happy to see some well-known names like Simone de Beauvoir or Boris Vian. It shows how much you researched and I think it adds depth to your story and the world you're building for Paul and the others to live in. Even if other players don't know them, maybe it will spark some interests to make them look into it!
( + ) For the backgrounds, they are just... wonderful. Saedee did a really good job and they are so colorful and refreshing. The details are a treat for the eyes. As for the textbox, it didn't disturb me much.
Then, the things that could be improved:
( - ) I don't know if you thought about it or were gonna do it, but when we are on the map, maybe it would be cool to highlight the places when we put the cursor on it (don't know if it makes sense). But it's just my opinion
( - ) It was already pointed out before but two of Ferdinand's expression are a bit... weird? Don't know how to describe them...
That's all for me! Playing that demo made my day and brought a smile to my face! It's starting to form slowly but surely~ Now, I'm going to wait to be able to help your Kickstarter when it will be ready.
I just played through the demo and I have some concerns. I’m going to write them out below, sorry for the long post.
First of all - will this game be commercial? If so, do you intend to update the main menu GUI, seeing as it’s the basic ren’py one but with some random paint brushes here and there? It looks very unprofessional and not becoming of a paid product.
As for the textbox - is this a placeholder? The colors are too saturated and bright, and it looks amateur. I can see it’s meant to be a French street sign, but they didn’t look like this until after 1950. It kind of ruins the beautiful backgrounds to have a big, ugly textbox.
I noticed quite a few grammatical mistakes, too. I wanted to ask if you have an editor or a proofreader? Also, in places, the English is a little wonky. “Get out the road” should either be “” Get out of the road” or “Get off the road”, for instance.
When you get into Paul’s room, the room is already full of painting supplies. Is this just to save money on variations, or is there something else planned here?
The paint brush that shows at the end of sentences also is often in the wrong place and covers the words.
On the choice where you decide whether to approach the woman or not in the flower shop, even if you pick to let her browse Nathalie still says “Perhaps that direct approach works well in the country” which doesn’t make sense.
In general, some of the sprites expressions are, well.. They’re downright creepy. For Ferdinand, some of the expressions change his face so much that he doesn’t even look the same.
So, that’s pretty much it. The backgrounds were lovely (props to the artist), and the premise was fine, but the way it was executed was rather poor.
I hope you’ll improve this before it goes on Kickstarter.
Thank you for the honest feedback! Some of those issues were already on my list, while some are new.
I'll ask the editor for another check. As for the GUI, it was my first attempt at doing one, so I guess I'll have to commission one since this was a fail XD
By the way, what's your source for those street name signs not being used in 1950? The regulation of the current signs was made in 1938, and it stated shape, color and design, including the semi-circle with the arrondissement number and the trompe-l'oeil circles on the corners, made to look as if they were nails holding the sign.
XD I actually have one. lol I see I should promote it more... https://www.patreon.com/ertal Patrons get previews of all the new art, additional sketches, early builds of the games for betatesting and some exclusive extra stories.
← Return to Visual Novel
Comments
Log in with itch.io to leave a comment.
Is the protagonist versatile?
Hopefully yes. It will be a stretch goal in the Kickstarter campaign (the FIRST stretch goal, because I really want it to happen).
Thanks for the reply! This made me even MORE interested in the game now.
Thank you so much!! ^_^
This was truly beautiful. The story, the ambience, the music, the art, the way how characters interact with each other... It's fair to say I'm in love with all these!
The only suggestion I can think of right now is that the text in the "Help", being white on a bright background, is a bit hard to read. An altered colour scheme could help.
Keep up with the great work, I can't wait to learn what's going to happen next.
Thank you for your kind words!
And... damn, I thought "Help" was disabled! I'll fix the screen if it's still accessible.
Oh damn, nice art. Finally dudes that look like actual dude, hell yeah.
is this a NSFW game?
It will have NSFW scenes, yes. But I'll probably add the option to skip them.
Quick question,is Gilles from Romania,cuz I'll lpce this game if he is,plus,I think this will be a great game,everyone looks cute for now
Aaaaw, nope, he's romani as in race (maybe in your country it's more common to call it "gypsy", as in mine?), but he's French.
I am sooo in love with this project! It looks great!!! I'm downloading the demo right now! Honestly I don't like playing demos because it just makes it harder to wait but I'll succumb to my desire lol. Also one more thing, you should probably take out the tag "otome" because it can mislead the wrong audience. Otome means a dating sim for girls that has a female mc with male love interests. Good luck with you're project, I am cheering you on!
Shiiit... Pardon my language, but I seriously can't wait for this to be reallll! I'm going to declare myself Ertal's number 1 fan, please don't fight me on this, you'll lose. I seriously can't get over how great all of these games are. The storylines are frickin amazing and the art is fantastic! Ugh, I'm obsessed.
T_T Thank you so much!
omg I need more Ferdinand in my life! And Gilles seems naughty and adorable!
The colors are right, the backgrounds are right, the music is right, the tropes are on point, I think you're gonna have a hit Ertal!
Ony one question; I assume in the full game there will be sprites for Paul, Nathalie and Ferdinand's sister, right?
Thank you!! <3
And yes, I hope the sprite artist finishes Denis, Nathalie and Ophelia's sprites for the updated demo, before the Kickstarter. The new GUI will be done by then, too.
For the finished games ALL the characters will have a sprite.
We'll get to see what they look like? Yuusss. I was hoping so! Ophelia's description left me wanting a visual representation for sure!
I stay clear of demos, because I always want to get the full deal.
Any idea when the full game will be available?
By the end of 2010, hopefully ;)
LOL! This made me laugh. 2010 has been and gone XDDD
OMG, we need the Tardis!
2020, I meant 2020! XDD
First of all, I want to say that I was really impatient to be able to play this demo! And I'm not disappointed at all~
Of course, it's short, doesn't show much of the game and have small mistakes in it. It's a demo. But just that little hour I took to play it, made me even more impatient to discover the rest of the story, characters and choices you have in store for us.
But enough chit-chat! Let's review this~
First, for the things I liked:
( + ) Paul's and Gilles' facial expressions are really cute. Great job Marimo, you nailed them. The other characters' sprites are great too (except for two of Ferdinand's expression which are... a bit disturbing XD).
( + ) The story, although we didn't see much of it, was great and relaxing after such a heavy subject like slavery in "My Burning Heart". I dived into it immediately. As for the characters, they have their own distinct personality too. Paul is adorable and impossible to hate, Emile is a bit rude but seems to hide a lot of things, Ferdinand is silent and way too serious for his own good, and Gilles looks like an innocent little kid in this cruel world! So far, I'm impatient to discover more about them~
( + ) The music is really relaxing and a treat for the ears. I especially like the one you hear when you are at the riverbank! I could definitely join Paul and start painting while listening to this song. I also like the sax song and "Let's fall in love" was a nice surprise! Great addition~
( + ) Maybe it's because I'm French but I was happy to see some well-known names like Simone de Beauvoir or Boris Vian. It shows how much you researched and I think it adds depth to your story and the world you're building for Paul and the others to live in. Even if other players don't know them, maybe it will spark some interests to make them look into it!
( + ) For the backgrounds, they are just... wonderful. Saedee did a really good job and they are so colorful and refreshing. The details are a treat for the eyes. As for the textbox, it didn't disturb me much.
Then, the things that could be improved:
( - ) I don't know if you thought about it or were gonna do it, but when we are on the map, maybe it would be cool to highlight the places when we put the cursor on it (don't know if it makes sense). But it's just my opinion
( - ) It was already pointed out before but two of Ferdinand's expression are a bit... weird? Don't know how to describe them...
That's all for me! Playing that demo made my day and brought a smile to my face! It's starting to form slowly but surely~ Now, I'm going to wait to be able to help your Kickstarter when it will be ready.
R.
Aaaaw, thank you so much!
Those two things you mention are already worked on, so don't worry!
Hi there,
I just played through the demo and I have some concerns. I’m going to write them out below, sorry for the long post.
First of all - will this game be commercial? If so, do you intend to update the main menu GUI, seeing as it’s the basic ren’py one but with some random paint brushes here and there? It looks very unprofessional and not becoming of a paid product.
As for the textbox - is this a placeholder? The colors are too saturated and bright, and it looks amateur. I can see it’s meant to be a French street sign, but they didn’t look like this until after 1950. It kind of ruins the beautiful backgrounds to have a big, ugly textbox.
I noticed quite a few grammatical mistakes, too. I wanted to ask if you have an editor or a proofreader? Also, in places, the English is a little wonky. “Get out the road” should either be “” Get out of the road” or “Get off the road”, for instance.
When you get into Paul’s room, the room is already full of painting supplies. Is this just to save money on variations, or is there something else planned here?
The paint brush that shows at the end of sentences also is often in the wrong place and covers the words.
On the choice where you decide whether to approach the woman or not in the flower shop, even if you pick to let her browse Nathalie still says “Perhaps that direct approach works well in the country” which doesn’t make sense.
In general, some of the sprites expressions are, well.. They’re downright creepy. For Ferdinand, some of the expressions change his face so much that he doesn’t even look the same.
So, that’s pretty much it. The backgrounds were lovely (props to the artist), and the premise was fine, but the way it was executed was rather poor.
I hope you’ll improve this before it goes on Kickstarter.
Thank you for the honest feedback! Some of those issues were already on my list, while some are new.
I'll ask the editor for another check. As for the GUI, it was my first attempt at doing one, so I guess I'll have to commission one since this was a fail XD
By the way, what's your source for those street name signs not being used in 1950? The regulation of the current signs was made in 1938, and it stated shape, color and design, including the semi-circle with the arrondissement number and the trompe-l'oeil circles on the corners, made to look as if they were nails holding the sign.
Very excited for this one!
The game's art is gorgeous! Your writing for plot and characters is just truly superb and I'm very excited to see what you do with this one!
I hope it has some raunchy scenes I oh so love from your other games!~
Hehehe, of course it will have naughty bits, who do you take me for?
And thank you so much <3
Nice!
Please pass my compliments on to the artists-- this game & its characters are so incredibly pretty!
I actually just looked a couple of days ago to see if Ertal and my other favorite creators had any new releases! I'm so excited, I cannot wait!! <3
Aaaw, thank you!
No thank you forrrr reaaaaal. Your work is amazing and I'm kind of only living for them right now!
If you have a Patreon or something, I'll sign up asap.
XD I actually have one. lol I see I should promote it more... https://www.patreon.com/ertal Patrons get previews of all the new art, additional sketches, early builds of the games for betatesting and some exclusive extra stories.
I'm going to look at it nooooooowwww.
I'm poor right now because I'm a crappy Uni student with a part time job, but in a couple of weeks, I'm joining your patreon for sure. <3
ooohh :) I'm very interested and excited ;))
Yay! I hope the demo doesn't disappoint ;) It will be out soon.
This sounds great! How long do you expect till it is available to play?
I hope we have a first demo by the end of February ;)